Monday, May 28, 2012

only three more days in May

too fast.
i want to slow everything down.
everything for me.
selfish?
so
i can hold my boy a little longer before his nap.
so
i can gaze at the mountains more deeply on a rainy morning.
so
i can rest side to side with my love and speak a thousand more soft words.
so
i can run another mile and feel stronger and braver for the day ahead.
so
i can call everyone i've been meaning to call but haven't because by day's close i'm beyond ready to curl up in bed.



just some thoughts.



i cut up mushrooms, peppers, and olives in mom's kitchen tonight.
dad said, it goes by too fast.  he looked out the window at eamon playing in the water with his uncles.

those are probably not his exact words, but what he voiced contained similar sentiment.

i responded, yeah, before i know it, eamon will be a dad.

mom quickly said, don't say that. 

it's true, i thought, though.  it's all going way too fast and i'm powerless to slow anything down but my breathing.  so slow it i will.  i will deepen it as well--for all the moments when i need to be present enough to remember the joy, sadness, beauty, happiness, or originality of a fleeting instance.